The boys are now in California on the youth mission trip. I know I’ve mentioned my difficulties with the Youth Leader (YL) before….well, now Bruce is getting the full measure of her annoyingness. They took the train to Sacramento, which seemed like a good idea at the time, but very few of the group had any experience with trains. See, freight trains take precedence over passenger trains, so that’s one problem. Then, there was some flooding in the Midwest, destroying Amtrak’s tracks, so they’re “borrowing” tracks from Union Pacific, and they’re at the mercy of UP. So, the train was supposed to leave here at 11:30 pm. It didn’t. It was late….very late. We called at 10 and they told us that it would be leaving at 3:30 or so. We went to bed, but I didn’t really sleep. We got up around 1:30 or so and called again. Train not leaving until 4:30. At this point, I told Bruce that I wouldn’t get any sleep, taking “naps” in the middle of the night. So we went to the station at 2:00 so that I could get some sleep. The train finally left near 5:00 am.
In the meantime, the YL was trying to hand off the blame for this to Amtrak, wanting us to “inundate” them with phone calls. Like bugging some poor call center in Wherever, USA would make the train get there sooner? She also told us that we, the parents, chose this. Yes, yes we did. However, our choices were to have parent chaperones drive rental vans straight through the night or take the train. The train seemed like the safer option. Bruce did say that the train ride itself was a pleasant experience, with more space in their “coach” seats than you get in business or first class on an airplane, and the dining car was really nice with affordable options for breakfast.
They arrived in Sacramento around 5:00 pm, in the middle of rush hour, which is more like the rush hour you see on TV with traffic not moving, etc. The YL didn’t want to try to go get the rental vehicles in that, so she decided that they’d go to dinner. According to her, the *only* option, in downtown Sacramento, was Denny’s. Bruce had a GPS (we replaced the one that was stolen), and his brother lives in the area, so he’s somewhat familiar with it. They were 2 blocks from Old Town Sacramento in one direction, and one block from a major shopping center, but the only choice is Denny’s.
The next morning, they were going to make sandwiches and hand them out to the homeless. Each “family group” was supposed to make 25 sandwiches to hand out. They’re staying in the dorms, so they’ve got a full kitchen to work with, and the family groups consist of 4-5 kids plus an adult. Bruce’s kids are all Boy Scouts, so they’ve done this before with the Salvation Army. And, really? It’s 25 sandwiches. The YL was freaking out about how many sandwiches and if they’d be done in time, etc. Of course, everyone managed to accomplish this project, so off they went to hand them out.
Only the YL didn’t really have a plan. Bruce thought she’d set something up with a local organization. Nope. They were just supposed to go to a park and hand them out. And there weren’t very many homeless people in the park. And, on the way to the park, they said they’d follow Bruce. Well, the park was on the same street they were already on, so he just drove down the road rather than getting on the freeway YL got mad cuz Bruce “just took off” and they got on the freeway……Bruce beat them by 10 minutes.
So, three parks later, they still haven’t found any homeless people. Can you imagine? A group of 30 youth and 6 adults wandering through the parks, asking people if they need a sandwich! It’s funny from here, but Bruce was really annoyed. Bruce finally found the Salvation Army and gave them the sandwiches. The Salvation Army was thrilled to have them and wanted to know if they could work with them some more over the weekend. Too bad YL hadn’t bothered to set this up from the outset!
On Monday and Tuesday, they went to a HUGE food bank warehouse yesterday to help sort donations. It’s essentially the distribution point for most of the metropolitan area, with things going from their warehouses to other food banks throughout the city. They get USDA donations, corporate donations, plus private donations from food drives and such. The USDA stuff has specific guidelines as to where, when and how it’s given out. The kids spent about 6 hours sorting things into piles, bins and boxes for canned goods, dry goods, glass jars (around here, we’re discouraged from giving things that come in glass), and even pet food!
Tuesday, the kids were all standing around a box snickering. Bruce has been around long enough to know that that's never a good thing and sure enough, it was a box of condoms and personal lubricant. Thankfully, and this is probably why he's so good at this stuff, Bruce is very matter-of-fact. He told the kids "Just put it in the 'Personal Hygiene' box and move on!" LOL!
The youth conference started last night, so they had to check out of the dorms and into their hotel yesterday. Once again, YL's craziness reared it's head. She's OCD and yet very disorganized, so she stresses about everything because it just has to be perfect, and it's driving Bruce completely bonkers! LOL
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Friday, July 22, 2011
So much to say....
and so little words to say it. That's not quite right, but it's close. I keep thinking "Oh...I should blog about that..." and never doing it. Now that I'm sitting down to do some writing, it all seems so, well, boring really.
Shannon spent the last week at Diabetes camp. This is her third year going and she loves it. She came home exhausted, a bit sunburned, and sporting "tattoos" drawn on her legs by her cabin-mates, plus sparkly toes and crackle-finish fingernails.
Because the boys left during the week (more on that in a minute), it was just Alana and I on Thursday and this morning. I slept in Thursday morning, but then Alana and I went out to lunch. She loves the Chinese buffet and we don't go when Shannon's home because there's gluten everywhere (the soy sauce is probably not gluten-free, plus the breading, sauces, won tons, noodles.....), so that's where we went. It was such a pleasant lunch, talking together, answering her questions and just spending some really good one-on-one time with her.
As has become tradition, we drove into Eden for lunch at the Mad Moose cafe. They've got espresso, sandwiches, soup, salads, etc, and it's always great food with great service for a decent price. They don't bat an eye when making Shannon's sandwich with lettuce instead of bread and she loves it. I had some fancy, yummy, sweet iced coffee concoction, with a burger. I haven't had a burger in AGES, and this was a perfect treat for me. On the way home, we stopped at a couple of fruit stands to buy cherries and raspberries. We'll be making some freezer jam on Sunday.
The boys, as I mentioned, left on Thursday night. Or that was the plan. They were taking the train from here to Sacramento. But, see, trains are a bit, um, flexible and unpredictable. Freight trains take precedence over passenger trains, so Amtrak actually tells you that the train could arrive up to 8 hours late. Yes, really. The train to CA was supposed to leave at 11:30, so the boys were supposed to be there at 10. A little late, but not a huge problem, right?
Yeah. So, the train was late. And getting later. We went to bed, if you can call it that, at 10, after learning that the train would be leaving at 3:00 AM. Yes, the middle of the night. I didn't really sleep, though, and finally gave up around 1:00. Bruce got up a little later, and called Amtrak for an updated departure time. 4:30.
I take sleeping pills or I don't sleep. I can't take those and then plan to drive somewhere in the middle of the night. So, Bruce took pity on me and had me drop them off at 2:00 am instead of 3:00 so that I could come home, take my pills, and get some sleep. The train finally left around 5:00 am.
In the meantime, the youth leader, who planned this adventure, is trying to shift the blame off of herself. She was mad at Amtrak and wanted all of us to be calling them all night long. Because bugging the people at the call center in Wherever USA will make the train arrive sooner? To be fair, this is the option the parents chose. Our other option was to rent vans and have parent chaperones drive straight through. This one seemed much safer.
So the boys are in Sacramento and it's not well organized. Bruce has come to the conclusion that Tristan is probably done with youth group. I've got mixed feelings about that, but mostly they're my own stuff. Youth group was such a fabulous thing in my life when I was Tristan's age. But he's not me. And he's got several other positive things in his life; places where he's making friends and enjoying himself; things that build him up and encourage him. Youth group has become a chore for all of us.
Okay, I've got more, but my fingers are tired and I can't type clearly, so I'm going to bed.
Shannon spent the last week at Diabetes camp. This is her third year going and she loves it. She came home exhausted, a bit sunburned, and sporting "tattoos" drawn on her legs by her cabin-mates, plus sparkly toes and crackle-finish fingernails.
Because the boys left during the week (more on that in a minute), it was just Alana and I on Thursday and this morning. I slept in Thursday morning, but then Alana and I went out to lunch. She loves the Chinese buffet and we don't go when Shannon's home because there's gluten everywhere (the soy sauce is probably not gluten-free, plus the breading, sauces, won tons, noodles.....), so that's where we went. It was such a pleasant lunch, talking together, answering her questions and just spending some really good one-on-one time with her.
As has become tradition, we drove into Eden for lunch at the Mad Moose cafe. They've got espresso, sandwiches, soup, salads, etc, and it's always great food with great service for a decent price. They don't bat an eye when making Shannon's sandwich with lettuce instead of bread and she loves it. I had some fancy, yummy, sweet iced coffee concoction, with a burger. I haven't had a burger in AGES, and this was a perfect treat for me. On the way home, we stopped at a couple of fruit stands to buy cherries and raspberries. We'll be making some freezer jam on Sunday.
The boys, as I mentioned, left on Thursday night. Or that was the plan. They were taking the train from here to Sacramento. But, see, trains are a bit, um, flexible and unpredictable. Freight trains take precedence over passenger trains, so Amtrak actually tells you that the train could arrive up to 8 hours late. Yes, really. The train to CA was supposed to leave at 11:30, so the boys were supposed to be there at 10. A little late, but not a huge problem, right?
Yeah. So, the train was late. And getting later. We went to bed, if you can call it that, at 10, after learning that the train would be leaving at 3:00 AM. Yes, the middle of the night. I didn't really sleep, though, and finally gave up around 1:00. Bruce got up a little later, and called Amtrak for an updated departure time. 4:30.
I take sleeping pills or I don't sleep. I can't take those and then plan to drive somewhere in the middle of the night. So, Bruce took pity on me and had me drop them off at 2:00 am instead of 3:00 so that I could come home, take my pills, and get some sleep. The train finally left around 5:00 am.
In the meantime, the youth leader, who planned this adventure, is trying to shift the blame off of herself. She was mad at Amtrak and wanted all of us to be calling them all night long. Because bugging the people at the call center in Wherever USA will make the train arrive sooner? To be fair, this is the option the parents chose. Our other option was to rent vans and have parent chaperones drive straight through. This one seemed much safer.
So the boys are in Sacramento and it's not well organized. Bruce has come to the conclusion that Tristan is probably done with youth group. I've got mixed feelings about that, but mostly they're my own stuff. Youth group was such a fabulous thing in my life when I was Tristan's age. But he's not me. And he's got several other positive things in his life; places where he's making friends and enjoying himself; things that build him up and encourage him. Youth group has become a chore for all of us.
Okay, I've got more, but my fingers are tired and I can't type clearly, so I'm going to bed.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Truth
Part of the Brave Girl stuff is to learn to recognize the lies we tell ourselves and/or allow others to tell us, particularly about who and what we are. There are several of these that have come to light lately, but for now, they'll stay private as I work with it a bit more and get braver about posting them here.
But, today, my Truth Teller nearly slapped me upside the head.
I'm setting a terrible example for my children. Now, she probably wouldn't phrase it quite like that, so let me edit that. I can and will set a better example for my children. (The Truth Teller is always positive and kind, see.....)
Here's the thing. I set out a few basic rules this summer for the kids. They have to get dressed, brush their teeth and hair, eat and clean up, plus practice their instrument before they can get near anything with a screen.
However, I frequently park myself in front of this box before I'm even awake.
So, starting tomorrow morning......no screen time for me until I've finished a few things too!
But, today, my Truth Teller nearly slapped me upside the head.
I'm setting a terrible example for my children. Now, she probably wouldn't phrase it quite like that, so let me edit that. I can and will set a better example for my children. (The Truth Teller is always positive and kind, see.....)
Here's the thing. I set out a few basic rules this summer for the kids. They have to get dressed, brush their teeth and hair, eat and clean up, plus practice their instrument before they can get near anything with a screen.
However, I frequently park myself in front of this box before I'm even awake.
So, starting tomorrow morning......no screen time for me until I've finished a few things too!
Updates
I keep thinking I need to have "meaningful" posts, rather than just my non-stop rambling, but the reality is that there's meaning in the ramblings. At least for me. And, according to my site meter, no one's really reading anyway, so I guess I'll write for myself.
1. Survived all the family closeness recently. That's a bonus. And, as far as I can tell, there are few if any hurt feelings. I hope anyway.
2. Summer has finally arrived. We've had a few weeks of warm weather, and a few weeks with little to do, so it seems like we're in the full swing of summer and it's nice.
3. My clothesline died. I'm annoyed. It drives me crazy to spend the energy (and $$) to dry things, particularly sheets, that will dry in half the time in the sun for FREE. But I've no where to hang them right now, so there we go. Bruce is scheming to use the holes already in place for the volleyball net to get me a new line. We'll see.
4. Tristan enjoyed Bell Tour. Though, by the end, I think he was peopled out. He's an introvert so being around people all the time is exhausting for him. He had a good time, and I think he'll go again.
5. Now, to work on cutting out some other stuff from his life. This is still a bone of contention with Bruce and I. Every activity the boy has a chance to do is one Bruce thinks he should. We're spending an awful lot of resources on that child and it's wearing me out. Bruce keeps talking about how it's all good stuff and will help keep him out of trouble. True enough, but there's only so much room in one person's life for all that good stuff. And Tristan really isn't inclined to get into too much trouble in the first place! Next summer, for instance, Tristan could go on Bell Tour, to a Boy Scout high adventure camp (Northern Tier), and to Mexico on a mission trip.
6. That was starting to turn into a rant about Bruce and I don't really want to do that. We're turning over new leaves in our marriage and I want to work to build it, not destroy it by ranting all over the very possibly public internet.
7. Bruce's niece is getting married in August in Washington DC. We're not going. It just isn't in our financial plan at the moment. I feel bad, but we've worked so hard, and this really is the first time something like this has come up that Bruce hasn't jumped all over, no matter the cost, and it's his family, so I'm following his lead. Not going means we can send a large gift card instead, and we're really not close to that part of the family. I think that's why Bruce is torn. Geography has played a role in the family distance and he'd like to bridge that. Not to mention, this is the niece everyone is so convinced will be a failure her whole life and we'd like to show her our support.
8. Bruce's parents are going to the wedding. They're flying, after calculating that it would cost 2x as much to drive their motor home out there. This is funny to me because FIL had such a hard time understanding why we'd fly to DisneyWorld instead of driving!
9. Bruce's Washington DC family hasn't seen his parents in a long time. 7 years, if I'm remembering correctly. A couple of the grandchildren have been out this way and have seen them, but I doubt they'd realize just how much MIL's health has deteriorated over the last few years. They're in for a shock, I think. And MIL is talking about how she's not sure she'll go....not sure she can make it, etc. I really hope she does because I just don't think the sisters have any idea how unhealthy she truly is. I'm sure she's not telling them.
10. Bruce thinks his mom isn't going to live for more than about a year. Another reason I hope she goes to the wedding. The sisters really have no idea and I know they'll feel bad having not seen her in so long.
11. Bruce wants to go visit his parents for a weekend again. You can imagine how thrilled I am about that. Yes, there was an argument. But, I think I won in the end. Now he's talking about going to a beer festival up there in September. Since this isn't something the kids and I will enjoy, we're possibly off the hook.
12. Shannon wants to take art lessons. And French. And tennis. Alana wants to take art lessons. And swimming, but only private lessons with our friend who's not doing them this year. And tennis. I'm hoping to find someone who can teach some art stuff locally for cheap.
13. I went to the doctor for my annual check up. To be totally honest, if I didn't need him to authorize a refill of my sleeping meds, and my insurance weren't essentially paying me to do it, I wouldn't go. I have lost a little weight, but it's bouncing up and down by about 2 lbs. Everything looked good, except my vitamin D was low, so I'm now taking my supplements again. So far, I haven't noticed a difference, but it's only been a few days. However, supplements mean I have to eat breakfast (or I'm burping up herbs all morning) and that's a good thing too.
14. My resolve not to play computer games keeps slipping, but I am getting better. I find myself staring at a Zuma Blitz board and wondering just what the heck I'm doing. And I move on to scrapbooking or laundry or something else. I've nearly finished two of the three Disney scrapbooks for the kids.
15. I've decided to catch up on the other stuff by doing it digitally, printing the pages, and slapping them in. My next task is to plan that out a bit. See, digitally, I can work on it just about anywhere, as long as I have power or my battery holds out (not long....the computer's old!). It doesn't make a mess all over a table. I can save the page, half-finished, and walk away. And, I can make one page, and essentially duplicate it for the other kids, swapping pictures in and out. However, I do need to do some planning so I can incorporate memorabilia and "regular" pages in there too. We'll see how it goes.
16. I've started "Soul Work" through the Brave Girls Club, introduced to me by a couple of very dear friends. It's been enlightening and fun. I've been working toward something like this for a long time, with that sense that something's coming, something's out there I need to learn. I don't know that *this* specific thing is what I've been waiting for/looking toward, but it certainly provides a framework for me to further explore things I've been trying to work through on my own.
17. YIKES! Be careful what you type in your browser or you'll find lesbian porn with your daughter sitting just a few feet away.
And with that, I'm going to take a shower and start my day. There are sheets to change and scrapbooks to create!
1. Survived all the family closeness recently. That's a bonus. And, as far as I can tell, there are few if any hurt feelings. I hope anyway.
2. Summer has finally arrived. We've had a few weeks of warm weather, and a few weeks with little to do, so it seems like we're in the full swing of summer and it's nice.
3. My clothesline died. I'm annoyed. It drives me crazy to spend the energy (and $$) to dry things, particularly sheets, that will dry in half the time in the sun for FREE. But I've no where to hang them right now, so there we go. Bruce is scheming to use the holes already in place for the volleyball net to get me a new line. We'll see.
4. Tristan enjoyed Bell Tour. Though, by the end, I think he was peopled out. He's an introvert so being around people all the time is exhausting for him. He had a good time, and I think he'll go again.
5. Now, to work on cutting out some other stuff from his life. This is still a bone of contention with Bruce and I. Every activity the boy has a chance to do is one Bruce thinks he should. We're spending an awful lot of resources on that child and it's wearing me out. Bruce keeps talking about how it's all good stuff and will help keep him out of trouble. True enough, but there's only so much room in one person's life for all that good stuff. And Tristan really isn't inclined to get into too much trouble in the first place! Next summer, for instance, Tristan could go on Bell Tour, to a Boy Scout high adventure camp (Northern Tier), and to Mexico on a mission trip.
6. That was starting to turn into a rant about Bruce and I don't really want to do that. We're turning over new leaves in our marriage and I want to work to build it, not destroy it by ranting all over the very possibly public internet.
7. Bruce's niece is getting married in August in Washington DC. We're not going. It just isn't in our financial plan at the moment. I feel bad, but we've worked so hard, and this really is the first time something like this has come up that Bruce hasn't jumped all over, no matter the cost, and it's his family, so I'm following his lead. Not going means we can send a large gift card instead, and we're really not close to that part of the family. I think that's why Bruce is torn. Geography has played a role in the family distance and he'd like to bridge that. Not to mention, this is the niece everyone is so convinced will be a failure her whole life and we'd like to show her our support.
8. Bruce's parents are going to the wedding. They're flying, after calculating that it would cost 2x as much to drive their motor home out there. This is funny to me because FIL had such a hard time understanding why we'd fly to DisneyWorld instead of driving!
9. Bruce's Washington DC family hasn't seen his parents in a long time. 7 years, if I'm remembering correctly. A couple of the grandchildren have been out this way and have seen them, but I doubt they'd realize just how much MIL's health has deteriorated over the last few years. They're in for a shock, I think. And MIL is talking about how she's not sure she'll go....not sure she can make it, etc. I really hope she does because I just don't think the sisters have any idea how unhealthy she truly is. I'm sure she's not telling them.
10. Bruce thinks his mom isn't going to live for more than about a year. Another reason I hope she goes to the wedding. The sisters really have no idea and I know they'll feel bad having not seen her in so long.
11. Bruce wants to go visit his parents for a weekend again. You can imagine how thrilled I am about that. Yes, there was an argument. But, I think I won in the end. Now he's talking about going to a beer festival up there in September. Since this isn't something the kids and I will enjoy, we're possibly off the hook.
12. Shannon wants to take art lessons. And French. And tennis. Alana wants to take art lessons. And swimming, but only private lessons with our friend who's not doing them this year. And tennis. I'm hoping to find someone who can teach some art stuff locally for cheap.
13. I went to the doctor for my annual check up. To be totally honest, if I didn't need him to authorize a refill of my sleeping meds, and my insurance weren't essentially paying me to do it, I wouldn't go. I have lost a little weight, but it's bouncing up and down by about 2 lbs. Everything looked good, except my vitamin D was low, so I'm now taking my supplements again. So far, I haven't noticed a difference, but it's only been a few days. However, supplements mean I have to eat breakfast (or I'm burping up herbs all morning) and that's a good thing too.
14. My resolve not to play computer games keeps slipping, but I am getting better. I find myself staring at a Zuma Blitz board and wondering just what the heck I'm doing. And I move on to scrapbooking or laundry or something else. I've nearly finished two of the three Disney scrapbooks for the kids.
15. I've decided to catch up on the other stuff by doing it digitally, printing the pages, and slapping them in. My next task is to plan that out a bit. See, digitally, I can work on it just about anywhere, as long as I have power or my battery holds out (not long....the computer's old!). It doesn't make a mess all over a table. I can save the page, half-finished, and walk away. And, I can make one page, and essentially duplicate it for the other kids, swapping pictures in and out. However, I do need to do some planning so I can incorporate memorabilia and "regular" pages in there too. We'll see how it goes.
16. I've started "Soul Work" through the Brave Girls Club, introduced to me by a couple of very dear friends. It's been enlightening and fun. I've been working toward something like this for a long time, with that sense that something's coming, something's out there I need to learn. I don't know that *this* specific thing is what I've been waiting for/looking toward, but it certainly provides a framework for me to further explore things I've been trying to work through on my own.
17. YIKES! Be careful what you type in your browser or you'll find lesbian porn with your daughter sitting just a few feet away.
And with that, I'm going to take a shower and start my day. There are sheets to change and scrapbooks to create!
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
On Wellness
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately, especially after Lent and how things went with that particular challenge. I started out looking to get rid of the junk in my life, from my home, my body, and my mind. The results were pretty great, really. I got rid of things in my home that had been weighing me down, and I got rid of things that I never should’ve been putting in my body to begin with. I got rid of computer games and found less back pain. Since Lent, I haven’t been as diligent and it shows. My weight has crept back up, which isn’t really the whole point, for me, but it’s an indication that things aren’t quite right.
Further, as you well know, I’m exhausted all the time and WAY too busy to enjoy my life. In sorting out my craft room , I realized that I miss working on those creative pursuits. But I fill my days with other things—facebook games, TV, PTA, and church things…..laundry and all my insane to-dos that are never done. I’m going a million miles an hour and not enjoying much of it. I don’t let myself have any down time, and I spend entirely too much time in front of this machine, while life just cruises on by.
So, the word for this summer is wellness. I’m still fleshing out what that means in my life, but I know some things. First, I must, must, MUST do something creative every day. It can be as simple as creating something new and different for dinner or solving a problem, but I’m fueled by those moments. I love to write. I love to read. I love to scrapbook and sew. I miss those things and I’m going to add them back into my life. It’s not selfish to pursue them. That’s the lie I’m struggling with at the moment, and the one that just might be the hardest to overcome. I don’t know where I got the idea that doing things I enjoy is selfish, but there it is. Somehow, somewhere I learned that, if I’m enjoying something, I’m shirking some other duty. The words aren’t quite right to convey the feeling, but it’s there. I feel guilty if I’m doing something I enjoy, like I shouldn’t be doing it. I’m going to have to give that some more thought.
I need to start with some basic things. I want to eat breakfast. I want to move my body. Well, okay, so maybe I don’t want to move my body so much, but I do want to feel good, and I feel good when I’m doing something active….or at least I feel good later. I want to take my supplements. I’m not sure when or how this one fell by the wayside, but it did and my body isn’t happy about it. I’m finding I get more hot flashes in the middle of the night at certain hormonal times….those were controlled by herbal supplements before. And heaven knows I have enough trouble sleeping as it is!
Why is it so easy to break good habits? Why is it so hard to break bad ones? Why is it so hard to establish those good habits in the first place?
Wellness also means spiritual disciplines for me…..that can be anything from yoga to writing to reading the Bible. God speaks to me in those quiet times and I love those moments. Those moments are essential for my well-being and there just aren’t enough of them in my life.
Further, as you well know, I’m exhausted all the time and WAY too busy to enjoy my life. In sorting out my craft room , I realized that I miss working on those creative pursuits. But I fill my days with other things—facebook games, TV, PTA, and church things…..laundry and all my insane to-dos that are never done. I’m going a million miles an hour and not enjoying much of it. I don’t let myself have any down time, and I spend entirely too much time in front of this machine, while life just cruises on by.
So, the word for this summer is wellness. I’m still fleshing out what that means in my life, but I know some things. First, I must, must, MUST do something creative every day. It can be as simple as creating something new and different for dinner or solving a problem, but I’m fueled by those moments. I love to write. I love to read. I love to scrapbook and sew. I miss those things and I’m going to add them back into my life. It’s not selfish to pursue them. That’s the lie I’m struggling with at the moment, and the one that just might be the hardest to overcome. I don’t know where I got the idea that doing things I enjoy is selfish, but there it is. Somehow, somewhere I learned that, if I’m enjoying something, I’m shirking some other duty. The words aren’t quite right to convey the feeling, but it’s there. I feel guilty if I’m doing something I enjoy, like I shouldn’t be doing it. I’m going to have to give that some more thought.
I need to start with some basic things. I want to eat breakfast. I want to move my body. Well, okay, so maybe I don’t want to move my body so much, but I do want to feel good, and I feel good when I’m doing something active….or at least I feel good later. I want to take my supplements. I’m not sure when or how this one fell by the wayside, but it did and my body isn’t happy about it. I’m finding I get more hot flashes in the middle of the night at certain hormonal times….those were controlled by herbal supplements before. And heaven knows I have enough trouble sleeping as it is!
Why is it so easy to break good habits? Why is it so hard to break bad ones? Why is it so hard to establish those good habits in the first place?
Wellness also means spiritual disciplines for me…..that can be anything from yoga to writing to reading the Bible. God speaks to me in those quiet times and I love those moments. Those moments are essential for my well-being and there just aren’t enough of them in my life.
Monday, June 20, 2011
Coincidence?
I'm PMSing.
I'm also surrounded by idiots!
I don't think one has anything to do with the other.
I'm also surrounded by idiots!
I don't think one has anything to do with the other.
Friday, June 17, 2011
And still more
(this feels a bit like cheating, but typing it all out would feel like repeating myself so....)
From May 17:
Per the enclosed article [note: I sent him an article about the preacher predicting the end of the world on May 21], if you get this letter, well, the world didn’t end. If you don’t get the letter, well, I hope I’ll be meeting you on the other side.
Shannon was confirmed on Sunday, so she’s now a full member of the United Methodist church and has voting rights in our local congregation. We’ve got a big meeting tonight, voting on whether or not to become a Reconciling Congregation, supporting the ability of gay/lesbian/transgendered persons to marry in the congregation and/or hold positions of authority, including being ordained as ministers. As you can imagine, this issue is dividing the denomination across the country, with some churches adamantly opposed to it, while others are in full support. Our particular church will probably pass it, though we won’t be at the meeting because the kids have a concert at school. Sadly, our denomination has come out with conflicting statements on the subject, saying that such behaviors are “incompatible with Christian teaching,” while also trying to uphold the dignity of all human beings. Because the church is made up of human beings, it is inherently flawed, and therefore, some have used the “incompatible” clause as a means to be mean and nasty to folks. As you can tell, I’m a bit in the middle, though leaning decidedly left. We have a couple of gay couples in our congregation and it doesn’t seem that strange to me. I come back to God as love and therefore we are called, above all, to love one another. It is not up to me, by any stretch, to decide if they (or anyone) are going up or down, kwim? But I also don’t like the way the issue is dividing the congregation and the denomination, creating such hostility. I don’t think God wants that either. *sigh*
So that was a bit heavy, wasn’t it?!
Mom and Dad did come for the confirmation, as did the Outlaws. It went as well as can be expected. MIL wasn’t horrible, though she’s just an odd duck. And she appears to be dealing with some short-term memory issues. She asked my parents three times in an afternoon where they’re living now.
Other conversations were just as amusing.
Me: Mom, here’s this great article I saved about local gluten-free stuff, including a website that reviews gluten-free food.
Mom: That’ll be a handy site
Me: Yep
MIL: I’ve got some gluten-free stuff at my house. How’s the flavor of that stuff? Do you think I could eat it?
Me: It’s hit and miss, but you could try it (thinking “WTH? Why would she have GF food? We haven’t been there in AGES”)
Conversation continues, including a mention of local bakeries that do big GF cakes for weddings, graduations, etc.
Mom, putting the paper on the sofa: Great article, Erica. Lots of great information.
MIL picks up the paper a few minutes later. Erica? Did you see this article on gluten-free foods?
Hello? Was she even there for the last 10 minutes? She actively participated in the conversation, so it’s not like she just walked in and randomly picked up the paper.
FIL seems to be having some issues too, but not as obvious or repetitive as MIL’s. Your family was over (and they went to church with us too), plus all the grandparents, for a total of 14 people in my kitchen for dinner. Your dad helped me make his “world famous” uber-simple noodles…..the ones with olive oil, garlic, basil, and parmesan cheese. So, after the meal, and your family’s departure for your grandparents’ party up north, the Outlaws started asking questions. I’d told them that we were going to have dinner in the mid-afternoon after the Pickett people got home from church that ended at 2:00. What church? They already went to church. No, they came for Shannon and then went to their ward. They’re Mormon? Yep (remember, MIL thinks that ya’ll are the root of all evil in her life). From MIL: But they’re such nice people! And FIL: But Marcus was confirmed today (yes, he said “MarcUs” and Marcos wasn’t even AT church—he thought 9:00 am was way too early). Um, no. He’s got a brother in the mission field, “my” missionary son that I got to talk to on Mother’s Day. Oh.
Not 20 minutes later, we had the same conversation all over again, including FIL *insisting* that MarcUs was confirmed at my church. LOL!
MIL still can’t get her head around the gluten-free thing. Some of that, I think, is her own ignorance, in spite of watching “The Doctors” religiously on TV (it’s a daytime talk show), and some of that is because she doesn’t see us very often. And this is a new-fangled disease that wasn’t around back in the day. She kept asking if Shannon could have gluten if it was cooked. And she had a hard time with the reasoning behind keeping Shannon’s peanut butter, jam, margarine and the like separated (I’ve got it marked with red masking tape). But she respected it. Or not. I really didn’t give her many opportunities not to. I put Shannon’s butter right in front of her, for instance, and it stayed there through the whole meal.
I contrast that with my parents asking carefully about things, including which toaster they can use, and your dad, who used a gluten-y spoon to wipe the garlic off the garlic-smoosher and immediately told me so that I wouldn’t use it for the garlic for Shannon. When I contrast the two, I really can’t tell if it’s a lack of experience or a lack of give-a-darn with my MIL, kwim?
One of Bruce’s nieces is getting married in August. I don’t know if any of us will be going to the wedding, though we’ll probably try to at least send Bruce. This niece has struggled with mental issues most of her life, OCD tendencies and the like, and she’s been finally diagnosed with bipolar disorder and is on a good combination of meds. She seems to be doing well, holding down a job, living with her boyfriend in Minnesota. They’ve been together at least 2 years. But MIL is convinced that the marriage won’t last. I think she’s been listening to the family members who’ve said for years that Niece’s problems were all because she didn’t have enough discipline/consequences as a child. These same family members predict gloom and doom for this poor child all the time, selling her short and poo-poohing any accomplishment. MAKES ME CRAZY! I hate it when people do that to other people. Like deciding that Marcos, with his struggles in school, will never be successful at anything. Sure, he’ll struggle with school, but he’s got other strengths that I think will serve him well. Niece is the same way.
Speaking of Marcos, he and Tristan built some shelves for the shed in your yard and Marcos was SO proud! I think he’d do really well at some kind of hands-on field like carpentry or plumbing or even cooking. He’s just got to find his niche.
Tristan developed strep over the weekend. He had insulin pump issues so his sugar got really high, and then he got a headache and sore throat, followed by a fever. He didn’t go to church with us, and he didn’t really participate in the meal afterwards either. MIL was convinced he was dying and his horrible parents weren’t doing anything about it (I was waiting it out…if I rush them to the doctor every time they get a fever, well, I might as well move in!). My mom thought he had a migraine and offered us some of her prescription migraine meds. Um, NO! Sunday night we decided to take him to Urgent Care, since the fever was creeping back up and we could tell his tonsils were swollen (he was talking like he had a huge gumball in his mouth) and the test came back positive. We got home around 11:30 and all the grandparents were still up. MIL said “she couldn’t sleep until she knew he was okay,” and my mom just worries about this stuff. So he stayed home from school yesterday, the mandatory 24-hour “quarantine” to keep it from spreading, and he was back to wrestling with Bruce last night.
Bruce called his parents to make sure they got home okay. MIL first insisted they’d called, but there was no record of that on any of our phones. Then she grilled Bruce again about Tristan and he repeated the same info we’d given her Sunday night and Monday morning. *sigh*
From May 18 [mundane and boring, but here it is]:
I had a lovely visitor today, from Murray’s finest. I was hoping it was about my break in and them telling me that they’d found my camera or the GPS. Nope. It seems that they were getting repeated hang-up 911 calls from a cell phone that they’d traced back to my house. Um? Say what?! So, I polled the kids, checked all the phones, and nothing. The calls were coming from an “unregistered” phone, meaning one that currently did not have actual service. And, they’d traced the *signal,* not the number, to within 0 meters of my house. I thought they only did that on TV! The officer was very nice, and said that the important thing was that everyone was okay and we didn’t need any emergency services.
Today, at work, I got a call from Shannon at school. She was in tears, poor thing. Her insulin pump had run out of insulin and she didn’t have all the supplies she needed at school so she was very upset. It really wasn’t a big deal, honestly, and I don’t know why she was in tears over it. She didn’t really know either! So, I took off and got her the things she needed and she went off to class. I’ll never completely understand teenagers, even when I was one!
I was right about our church. They voted to become a Reconciling Congregation. I hope it doesn’t create more division.
We got the house mostly put back together after a weekend of a zillion visitors. The trailer came down yesterday, after a fortuitous break in the weather that allowed it to dry out. I’m waiting for sunny skies to wash the sheets as I like to dry them outside on the clothesline.
The kids had a concert last night, both orchestra (Shannon) and symphonic band (Tristan), plus a couple of songs combining the two. It was really good. It’s been a long road to get here, going to concerts from the time they were in elementary school, squeaking along on stage! But they’ve all made such progress and it’s wonderful to hear and enjoy.
May 20, 2011
This “Rapture” stuff has gone viral! It’s really funny. One of the local news stations put a “Just in Case They’re Right” forecast up, with just a temperature for Saturday, and nothing for that night or the rest of next week…..it’s just an empty graphic! Too funny! There’s also a FaceBook event titled “Post-Rapture Looting,” for those who are left behind. The comments are hilarious! Talk of attending if they’re not too hung over from the pre-rapture partying, lists of things they’ve got their eyes on (houses, furniture, cars). It’s gotten pretty ridiculous. What do these people do when it doesn’t happen? This guy is absolutely positive that *now* is the time. His followers believe it too. What do you do when you’ve staked your whole life on something like this? I know! I’ll send some fresh-faced Mormon boys over there!
Talked to my friend whose inlaws were killed. She’d called the state police for one reason or another and spoke to one of the responding officers. Well, on her way to Boise, she was pulled over for speeding….by the same officer! He took her to where they had the car and let her remove their personal belongings from it. She said it was really hard, but she was glad she did it and not her husband because it would’ve been that much more difficult for him. She seems to be doing all right, but I worry. I don’t think she’s getting much sleep.
It’s raining. Again. Some more. Forever. Maybe the rapture isn’t such a bad idea? I’m sick sick SICK of the rain! This morning, we had a thunderstorm that shook the rafters and landed Alana in bed with us. I was a little surprised we didn’t have all 3 kids plus the dogs up there with us! The back yard looks like a jungle and I may never get to use my clothes line. The garden seems okay, but we haven’t been able to spray the apples. It’s pointless to do it until the rain lets up a bit or the spray just gets washed away, but we need to do it before the blossoms close up completely to keep the worms out (the worms form in the seed/center of the apple and eat their way out). It could be a banner crop of apples this year…..full of worms! *sigh*
From May 17:
Per the enclosed article [note: I sent him an article about the preacher predicting the end of the world on May 21], if you get this letter, well, the world didn’t end. If you don’t get the letter, well, I hope I’ll be meeting you on the other side.
Shannon was confirmed on Sunday, so she’s now a full member of the United Methodist church and has voting rights in our local congregation. We’ve got a big meeting tonight, voting on whether or not to become a Reconciling Congregation, supporting the ability of gay/lesbian/transgendered persons to marry in the congregation and/or hold positions of authority, including being ordained as ministers. As you can imagine, this issue is dividing the denomination across the country, with some churches adamantly opposed to it, while others are in full support. Our particular church will probably pass it, though we won’t be at the meeting because the kids have a concert at school. Sadly, our denomination has come out with conflicting statements on the subject, saying that such behaviors are “incompatible with Christian teaching,” while also trying to uphold the dignity of all human beings. Because the church is made up of human beings, it is inherently flawed, and therefore, some have used the “incompatible” clause as a means to be mean and nasty to folks. As you can tell, I’m a bit in the middle, though leaning decidedly left. We have a couple of gay couples in our congregation and it doesn’t seem that strange to me. I come back to God as love and therefore we are called, above all, to love one another. It is not up to me, by any stretch, to decide if they (or anyone) are going up or down, kwim? But I also don’t like the way the issue is dividing the congregation and the denomination, creating such hostility. I don’t think God wants that either. *sigh*
So that was a bit heavy, wasn’t it?!
Mom and Dad did come for the confirmation, as did the Outlaws. It went as well as can be expected. MIL wasn’t horrible, though she’s just an odd duck. And she appears to be dealing with some short-term memory issues. She asked my parents three times in an afternoon where they’re living now.
Other conversations were just as amusing.
Me: Mom, here’s this great article I saved about local gluten-free stuff, including a website that reviews gluten-free food.
Mom: That’ll be a handy site
Me: Yep
MIL: I’ve got some gluten-free stuff at my house. How’s the flavor of that stuff? Do you think I could eat it?
Me: It’s hit and miss, but you could try it (thinking “WTH? Why would she have GF food? We haven’t been there in AGES”)
Conversation continues, including a mention of local bakeries that do big GF cakes for weddings, graduations, etc.
Mom, putting the paper on the sofa: Great article, Erica. Lots of great information.
MIL picks up the paper a few minutes later. Erica? Did you see this article on gluten-free foods?
Hello? Was she even there for the last 10 minutes? She actively participated in the conversation, so it’s not like she just walked in and randomly picked up the paper.
FIL seems to be having some issues too, but not as obvious or repetitive as MIL’s. Your family was over (and they went to church with us too), plus all the grandparents, for a total of 14 people in my kitchen for dinner. Your dad helped me make his “world famous” uber-simple noodles…..the ones with olive oil, garlic, basil, and parmesan cheese. So, after the meal, and your family’s departure for your grandparents’ party up north, the Outlaws started asking questions. I’d told them that we were going to have dinner in the mid-afternoon after the Pickett people got home from church that ended at 2:00. What church? They already went to church. No, they came for Shannon and then went to their ward. They’re Mormon? Yep (remember, MIL thinks that ya’ll are the root of all evil in her life). From MIL: But they’re such nice people! And FIL: But Marcus was confirmed today (yes, he said “MarcUs” and Marcos wasn’t even AT church—he thought 9:00 am was way too early). Um, no. He’s got a brother in the mission field, “my” missionary son that I got to talk to on Mother’s Day. Oh.
Not 20 minutes later, we had the same conversation all over again, including FIL *insisting* that MarcUs was confirmed at my church. LOL!
MIL still can’t get her head around the gluten-free thing. Some of that, I think, is her own ignorance, in spite of watching “The Doctors” religiously on TV (it’s a daytime talk show), and some of that is because she doesn’t see us very often. And this is a new-fangled disease that wasn’t around back in the day. She kept asking if Shannon could have gluten if it was cooked. And she had a hard time with the reasoning behind keeping Shannon’s peanut butter, jam, margarine and the like separated (I’ve got it marked with red masking tape). But she respected it. Or not. I really didn’t give her many opportunities not to. I put Shannon’s butter right in front of her, for instance, and it stayed there through the whole meal.
I contrast that with my parents asking carefully about things, including which toaster they can use, and your dad, who used a gluten-y spoon to wipe the garlic off the garlic-smoosher and immediately told me so that I wouldn’t use it for the garlic for Shannon. When I contrast the two, I really can’t tell if it’s a lack of experience or a lack of give-a-darn with my MIL, kwim?
One of Bruce’s nieces is getting married in August. I don’t know if any of us will be going to the wedding, though we’ll probably try to at least send Bruce. This niece has struggled with mental issues most of her life, OCD tendencies and the like, and she’s been finally diagnosed with bipolar disorder and is on a good combination of meds. She seems to be doing well, holding down a job, living with her boyfriend in Minnesota. They’ve been together at least 2 years. But MIL is convinced that the marriage won’t last. I think she’s been listening to the family members who’ve said for years that Niece’s problems were all because she didn’t have enough discipline/consequences as a child. These same family members predict gloom and doom for this poor child all the time, selling her short and poo-poohing any accomplishment. MAKES ME CRAZY! I hate it when people do that to other people. Like deciding that Marcos, with his struggles in school, will never be successful at anything. Sure, he’ll struggle with school, but he’s got other strengths that I think will serve him well. Niece is the same way.
Speaking of Marcos, he and Tristan built some shelves for the shed in your yard and Marcos was SO proud! I think he’d do really well at some kind of hands-on field like carpentry or plumbing or even cooking. He’s just got to find his niche.
Tristan developed strep over the weekend. He had insulin pump issues so his sugar got really high, and then he got a headache and sore throat, followed by a fever. He didn’t go to church with us, and he didn’t really participate in the meal afterwards either. MIL was convinced he was dying and his horrible parents weren’t doing anything about it (I was waiting it out…if I rush them to the doctor every time they get a fever, well, I might as well move in!). My mom thought he had a migraine and offered us some of her prescription migraine meds. Um, NO! Sunday night we decided to take him to Urgent Care, since the fever was creeping back up and we could tell his tonsils were swollen (he was talking like he had a huge gumball in his mouth) and the test came back positive. We got home around 11:30 and all the grandparents were still up. MIL said “she couldn’t sleep until she knew he was okay,” and my mom just worries about this stuff. So he stayed home from school yesterday, the mandatory 24-hour “quarantine” to keep it from spreading, and he was back to wrestling with Bruce last night.
Bruce called his parents to make sure they got home okay. MIL first insisted they’d called, but there was no record of that on any of our phones. Then she grilled Bruce again about Tristan and he repeated the same info we’d given her Sunday night and Monday morning. *sigh*
From May 18 [mundane and boring, but here it is]:
I had a lovely visitor today, from Murray’s finest. I was hoping it was about my break in and them telling me that they’d found my camera or the GPS. Nope. It seems that they were getting repeated hang-up 911 calls from a cell phone that they’d traced back to my house. Um? Say what?! So, I polled the kids, checked all the phones, and nothing. The calls were coming from an “unregistered” phone, meaning one that currently did not have actual service. And, they’d traced the *signal,* not the number, to within 0 meters of my house. I thought they only did that on TV! The officer was very nice, and said that the important thing was that everyone was okay and we didn’t need any emergency services.
Today, at work, I got a call from Shannon at school. She was in tears, poor thing. Her insulin pump had run out of insulin and she didn’t have all the supplies she needed at school so she was very upset. It really wasn’t a big deal, honestly, and I don’t know why she was in tears over it. She didn’t really know either! So, I took off and got her the things she needed and she went off to class. I’ll never completely understand teenagers, even when I was one!
I was right about our church. They voted to become a Reconciling Congregation. I hope it doesn’t create more division.
We got the house mostly put back together after a weekend of a zillion visitors. The trailer came down yesterday, after a fortuitous break in the weather that allowed it to dry out. I’m waiting for sunny skies to wash the sheets as I like to dry them outside on the clothesline.
The kids had a concert last night, both orchestra (Shannon) and symphonic band (Tristan), plus a couple of songs combining the two. It was really good. It’s been a long road to get here, going to concerts from the time they were in elementary school, squeaking along on stage! But they’ve all made such progress and it’s wonderful to hear and enjoy.
May 20, 2011
This “Rapture” stuff has gone viral! It’s really funny. One of the local news stations put a “Just in Case They’re Right” forecast up, with just a temperature for Saturday, and nothing for that night or the rest of next week…..it’s just an empty graphic! Too funny! There’s also a FaceBook event titled “Post-Rapture Looting,” for those who are left behind. The comments are hilarious! Talk of attending if they’re not too hung over from the pre-rapture partying, lists of things they’ve got their eyes on (houses, furniture, cars). It’s gotten pretty ridiculous. What do these people do when it doesn’t happen? This guy is absolutely positive that *now* is the time. His followers believe it too. What do you do when you’ve staked your whole life on something like this? I know! I’ll send some fresh-faced Mormon boys over there!
Talked to my friend whose inlaws were killed. She’d called the state police for one reason or another and spoke to one of the responding officers. Well, on her way to Boise, she was pulled over for speeding….by the same officer! He took her to where they had the car and let her remove their personal belongings from it. She said it was really hard, but she was glad she did it and not her husband because it would’ve been that much more difficult for him. She seems to be doing all right, but I worry. I don’t think she’s getting much sleep.
It’s raining. Again. Some more. Forever. Maybe the rapture isn’t such a bad idea? I’m sick sick SICK of the rain! This morning, we had a thunderstorm that shook the rafters and landed Alana in bed with us. I was a little surprised we didn’t have all 3 kids plus the dogs up there with us! The back yard looks like a jungle and I may never get to use my clothes line. The garden seems okay, but we haven’t been able to spray the apples. It’s pointless to do it until the rain lets up a bit or the spray just gets washed away, but we need to do it before the blossoms close up completely to keep the worms out (the worms form in the seed/center of the apple and eat their way out). It could be a banner crop of apples this year…..full of worms! *sigh*
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