She's ba-ack!

I know it's been, like, forever, ya know? 

(Okay, okay...no more channeling my inner Valley Girl)

I keep meaning to post and then I get side-tracked and I just never get here.  I have, however, made lots of little lists of things I want to write about and share and I'll get to them, I promise.

First, Lent.

It began last Wednesday, February 13th.  Yes, the day before Valentine's Day.  So, no, I have not had any Valentine chocolates.  And I won't until Easter.

Like years past, I've given up all junk food and all computer games.  Well, almost all.  Wine is not junk food.  Beer is.  Don't ask me why I think that way.  Maybe it's the carbonation?  And Words With Friends is, technically, both a computer game and a phone game, plus it's interactive, so I'm still playing it.  On my phone. 

The junk food has been relatively easy.  Every now and then I want something crunchy, but it's not in the house, so I have to make do.  I don't usually have chips in the house anyway, except the occasional bag of plain corn chips, so it hasn't been too challenging.  Same goes for candy.  I've had moments, like the Valentine party last week, where it might have been nice to pop a few M&Ms in my mouth, but then I got busy leading the activity and the feeling passed.

Computer games, however, are a completely different animal.  I have discovered that I have virtually NO self-control with them.  Zero.

There is a school of thought, backed by folks way more educated in said matters than I, that says that Sundays are like mini-Easters and, therefore, one can indulge on Sundays during Lent.  This is backed up by the way Lent is figured.  It's the 40 days before Easter, not counting Sundays. 

Now, I should know better.  I really should know myself a bit better by now, but I "allowed" myself to play some computer games on Sunday.  And I played and played and played.  I planted and harvested my virtual crops on FarmVille, and I fired off all those little bubbles on Bubble Safari.  I even cleared a few levels!  I worried that my friends would surpass me in FarmVille, getting to the next levels way ahead of me. 

And the next thing I knew, two hours had passed.  My back ached from sitting in the chair.  My foot was asleep, and there were two dirty bowls and a glass next to my laptop, since I couldn't be bothered to eat anywhere else. 

To add insult to injury, then I had to go through withdrawal again yesterday!  I got up and I automatically went to my games on Facebook.  Whoops! 

This, friends, is why I do this in the first place.  I really need these few weeks to reset myself as Spring approaches.  And this year, I think I need it more than ever.  The seasonal depression has been worse than ever, leaving me struggling to get out of bed and do even the most basic of care-taking.  I eat crap and play games all day in my PJ pants, finally getting dressed just before it's time to get the kids from school.  Obviously, this isn't good for anyone.  I hate it, but lack the will and motivation to do anything about it.  That's depression for you, in it's purest, most insidious form. 

Lent, in spite of it's deprivation and seriousness, is a sign that winter WILL lose it's grip on us eventually.  Spring WILL come.  And changing a few things in my life as I wait so impatiently for that renewal helps give me a jolt, a startle perhaps.  I have to find things to do to entertain myself.  Sure, I could wind up on the couch watching TV for hours, but that gets old after a day or two and I move on to something more productive.

Last week, between Wednesday and Friday, I read two books!  Granted, they were young adult fiction (Peter and the Starcatchers series), but I read instead of playing mindless games.  So far, there's no weight loss to show for the 'no junk' thing, but that's okay.  I did discover that my clothes do, in fact, weigh 2 pounds.  LOL! 

Now I'm back on the program, working to resist clicking that Bubble Safari link (I LOVE THAT GAME!) and I'm back to blogging.  Yay me!